[Hindi Jokes] Fun with Facts...:)

 

Santa- kal meri shadi hai aur ladki walon ne kam log bulaye hai.
Banta- to isme prob kya hai?
Santa-pata nahi papa mujhe le jayenge ya nhi

##########

New style of proposing Love
I have spent many sleepless nights in your love and I don't want my son to do the same for your daughter… so lets make them brother and sister.

#############                  

Santa: Sharab pite pite rone laga
Banta: Kya hua kyon ro rahe ho?
Santa: Yaar ki kara jis ladki ko bhulane k liye pi raha tha,uska naam yaad nhi aa raha hai

###########

By giving just our Vote to Mr Narendra Modi we are waiting for miracle to happen.

Aisaa Kuchh hone wala nahi….Aisa kuchh ho bhi nahi sakta…

Akela Mr Narendra Modi kya karega and kitana karega...

We need to change...

Jisko dekho woh paise baator ne ke koi bhi opportunity nahi chodta...

 

System is Spoiled in many areas.

Economy is already OFF the Tracked.

Talent and Black Money is already MIGRATED to Overseas.

Unfortunately Few Politicians are unqualified

Fortunately Media is Qualified  

Media is Powerful then they can control Wrong Doers

 

Akela Mr. Narendra Modi Kya Karega Aur Kitna Karega????

Change your thoughts …Desh Badlega

 

Every common man must play,

 Every Indian Need to play Genuine Role In the Interest of NATION.

It's a group Effort...

If you Agreeing to this then Fwd....This mail...Implement as well.

Wife to Husband :-
You don't Love me at all….

Husband points towards their 2 Children and says –
then do u think I've downloaded these from Google?

## # # # # # # # # # #                                                                     

New style of proposing Love
I have spent many sleepless nights in your love

and

I don't want my son to do the same for your daughter…

so lets make them brother and sister.

# # # # # # #       

                   

I want u …
To be with me In a nice Restaurant
To have candle light dinner…. &
to say those sweet three words to U….
"Pay The Bill"

# # # # # # # #

Aap kya jano hum aap ko kitna yaad karte hai,
Har pal aap ki faryad karte hai,
Roz khat likhte hai Cartoon network ko,
Aap ko dikhane ki mang karte hai

========================

 

Unintended recipient You may enjoy / Delete / Ignore / Reply-Unsubscribe

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Posted by: KALPESH PATEL <zeenukalpesh@yahoo.com>

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[Hindi Jokes] Jokes, Shayaris, Quote (06.07.14)

 

CHAK DE

======

Saaf saaf keh dene chahiye kisi se gila ho agar koi,,,

Faisle,,, Faaslo se kaafi behtar hote hain...!!!!

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Pyar ki hadh toh dekho..

Mai karta raha uska intezaar 

aur waqt ne aage badna he chod diya...

======

मुमकिन हो तो मेरे दिल में रह लो,

इससे बेहतरीन मेरे पास कोई घर नहीं

======

नर्म लफ़्ज़ों से भी लग जाती है चोटें अक्सर,

रिश्ते निभाना बड़ा नाज़ुक सा हुनर होता है...

======

कोई ताल्लुक न जोड़ो मगर सामने तो रहो.....

तुम अपने गुरूर में खुश, 

और हम अपने सुरूर में खुश !!!!

======

"अपनी खुद की गलतियों पर हसना,

आपकी उम्र बढा सकता हॆ- " -शेक्सपियर 

" अपनी बीवी की गलतियों पर हसना,

आपकी उम्र घटा भी सकता हॆ" -शेक्सपियर की बीवी

======

Height of taunt:

I was sitting in the window n singing

"Kabutar ja ja ja"

.

Mom came n replied

"Net pack samplay wattat"

======

Technical PJ Will surely kill u -

Scientists were playing hide & seek in heaven.

Einstein was seeker.

Newton didn't hide & stood in a square of 1 meter.

Einstein: I found u Newton !! Thhappa !!!

Newton: U are Wrong.

I am not Newton.

As I am standing in 1 mtr square, I am Newton/per mt sq. 

So I am Pascal.

Aatli Batli Futli...

======

जब चलना नहीं आता तो गिरने नहीं देते थे लोग....

जब से संभाला खुद को.. कदम कदम पर गिराने की सोचते है लोग...

======

Aaj ka Gyan

हम भारतीयों के पास 

हर समस्या का समाधान होता है ...

बस समस्या 

दूसरे की होनी चाहिए ...

======

तुमने क्या सोचा कि तुम्हारे सिवा कोई नही मुझे चाहने वाला,

छोङ कर तो देख, मौत तैयारखङी है मुझे अपने सीने से लगाने के लिए…!!!

======

हर बार थाम लेंगे गिरो चाहे जितनी भी बार तुम..

इल्तिजा बस इतनी ही है मेरी नज़रों से न गिरना तुम...!!

======

तुम आओ कभी दस्तक तो दो दर-ए-दिल पर;

प्यार पहले से कम हो तो सज़ा-ए-मौत दे देना..!!!

======

 ला तेरे पेरों पर मरहम लगा दूं...

कुछ चोट तो तुझे भी आई होगी मेरे दिल को ठोकर मार कर...!!!

======

"मैं झुक गया तो वो सज़दा समझ बैठे,

मैं तो इन्सानियत निभा रहा था ... 

वो खुद को ख़ुदा समझ बैठे...!!".

======

यहाँ मेरा कोई अपना नहीं है..

..चलो अच्छा है कुछ ख़तरा नहीं है !!

======

हर किसी के नाम पे नहीं रूकती,

धडकनों के भी अपने उसूल होते हैं.

======

कहानियाँ कुछ यूं भी 

अधूरी रह जाती है

कभी पन्ने कम पङ जाते हैं 

कभी स्याही सूख जाती है

======

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Posted by: Mahesh Popat <mahesh_popat@ymail.com>

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[Hindi Jokes] Inspiration Story (06.07.14)

 

CHAK DE

A doctor entered the hospital in hurry after being called in for an urgent surgery. He answered the call asap, changed his clothes & went directly to the surgery block. He found the boy's father pacing in the hall waiting for the doctor. 

On seeing him, the dad yelled:

"Why did you take all this time to come? Don't you know that my son's life is in danger? Don't you have any sense of responsibility?"

The doctor smiled & said:

"I am sorry, I wasn't in the hospital & I came as fast as I could after receiving the call…… And now, I wish you'd calm down so that I can do my work"

"Calm down?! What if your son was in this room right now, would you calm down? If your own son dies now what will you do??" said the father angrily

The doctor smiled again & replied: "I will say what Job said in the Holy Book "From dust we came & to dust we return, blessed be the name of God". Doctors cannot prolong lives. Go & intercede for your son, we will do our best by God's grace"

"Giving advises when we're not concerned is so easy" Murmured the father.

The surgery took some hours after which the doctor went out happy,

"Thank goodness!, your son is saved!" And without waiting for the father's reply he carried on his way running. "If you have any questions, ask the nurse!!"

"Why is he so arrogant? He couldn't wait some minutes so that I ask about my son's state" Commented the father when seeing the nurse minutes after the doctor left.

The nurse answered, tears coming down her face: "His son died yesterday in a road accident, he was at the burial when we called him for your son's surgery. And now that he saved your son's life, he left running to finish his son's burial."

Moral: Never judge anyone….. because you never know how their life is & what they're going through"

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Posted by: Mahesh Popat <mahesh_popat@ymail.com>

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[Hindi Jokes] We Indians Are Unique (06.07.14)

 

CHAK DE

 We Indians Are Unique

1. Every Indian bachelor wants to marry a fair girl.

2. When the doorbell rings, a male or kid goes to open the door. But the female runs for her dupatta.

3. Picking up/dropping a relative (airport / railway stn) is an important family affair.

4. We thrive on street food and we don't get sick.

5. Every Indian mother has 2 careers - Working / Housewife + Match Making.

6. We have all had secret boyfriends / girlfriends. We don't care about them cheating on us but we dread getting caught by each others parents.

7. Indian girls have 3 type of brothers. Real brother, Cousin brother, Rakhee brother.

8. The bride must cry at her Vidai. She has no business looking happy.

9. We go on cleaning sprees only during Diwali or when we have guests coming over.

10. However old we are, our parents need to know every detail of our schedule. Daily. No excuses. No exemption.

11. When Indian parents buy tickets, every child becomes under 12. Getting a half ticket is a huge victory!

12. If we live in another city and don't call our Mom daily , she'll freak out and call all our friends to make sure we are alive.

13. We get embarrassed in front of our parents even when the word "sex" is written on a Form to specify gender.

14. No other nationality can beat Indians in bargaining. "Chalo bhaiya . Na tera na mera. Itne paise theek hain."

15. No matter if we are Convent educated. 

When we are actually angry, we switch to highly effective, dirty, swear words in our mother tongue.

16. We spend more time talking to guests at the door when they are leaving than while sitting in the living room.

17. Why to change the remote batteries when you can just slap the shit out of the remote and make it work?

18. Meeting a person with the same surname is like finding a long lost twin.

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Posted by: Mahesh Popat <mahesh_popat@ymail.com>

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[Hindi Jokes] Jokes, Shyaris, Qoute (06.07.14)

 

CHAK DE

======

Scientists have found ice and water On moon 

We just need to carry whisky and chips with us

Cant depend on Scientists for everything 

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"बादशाह की गली मेँ आकर बादशाह का पता नही पूंछते,

गुलामो के जुके हुए सर खुदबखुद

रास्ता बता देते है

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Hazaro ki ginti to hame nahi aati,

par khwab kuch aisa dekhte hai,

ke ret ka har zarra agar hira ban jaye to 

tohfe me aapko registan dene ki khwaish rakhte hai

======

मेरी आँखों के जादू से तुम अभी वाकिफ़ नही हो,

हम उसे भी जीना सिखा देते है, जिसे मरने का शौक हो......

======

अभी कदम ही रखा था 

हमने मैखाने में

की आवाज़ आई...

चला जा वापस ,

तुझे शराब की नहीं 

किसी के दीदार की ज़रूरत है...

======

Husband and wife had an heated argument on karva chauth day.

Husband came up with killer reply - Dimaag khane se bhi vrat tut jata hai! 

======

असल में वही जीवन की चाल समझता है ,

जो सफ़र में धूल को गुलाल समझता है..

======

Hostel student to his frnd:-

"bhai dhoa ho gya Dhoka" 

.

Frnd:- kya ho gaya...??

.

.

Student:- "Ghar se books k liye paise mangvaaye the,

.

.

.

gharwalo ne books hi bhej di....

======

Kisi ko "QURAN" mein "IMAAN" na mila

Kisi ko "GITA" mein "GYAAN" na mila

Kisi ko "GURUGRANTH" mein "SATNAAM" na mila

Kya milega unko "AASMAAN" mein "KHUDA",

Jinko "INSAAN" mein "INSAAN" na mila.

======

किसी भी रुत में खरीद लीजिये,

दिल के जख्म ताज़ा ही मिलेंगे.

======

मौत से क्या डर, मिनटों का खेल है

आफत तो जिंदगी है, बरसों चला करती हैं ...

======

दोस्त और बीवी को कभी  विश्वास दिलाने की जरुरत नहीं  होती।

क्योंकि दोस्त कभी शक़ नहीं  करेगा, 

और बीवी कभी यकीन  नहीं करेगी।....

======

सब समझते है, बात मतलब की, 

किस ने समझा है, बात का मतलब...

======

Gupta ji ne nayi car li aur car ke peeche likhwaya, " saawan ko aane do"

Peeche se truck ne thok diya. Truck par likha tha, " aaya saawan jhoom ke"

======

तुम भी कमाल करते हो ऐ पागल दिल 

उनको फुरसत नहीं और तुमको चैन नहीं !!!

======

कोई अपनों के लिए रोटी छोड़ देता है.... 

कोई रोटी के लिए अपनों को ही छोड़ देता है 

======

Unke na hone se kuch

bhi nahi badla yaro...

Bas kal jaha dil hota tha,

Aaj vaha dard hota hai...

======

Ye Sochkar Rok Leta Hu Me,

Kalam Ko Teri Tareef Likhte Likhte..

Ki Kahi In Lafzo Ko Sabse Behtareen,

Hone Ka Gumaan Na Ho Jay

======

__._,_.___

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Posted by: Mahesh Popat <mahesh_popat@ymail.com>

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