Sunday, April 11, 2010

[Hindi_Jokes] SUHANI KE SUHANE JOKES-11-12-13-14-15

 

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Ramesh- "Are, tere ghar me aag lag gaye aur tu

yaha bhaitha hai?"

Mahesh- "Tum bhi ajeeb ho yaar, chabi to mere paas

hai! Aag kaise lag sakti hai?"

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Premika- 'Kabhi-kabhi tum aadmi maaloom padhte

ho aur kabhi-kabhi tumhara vyavhaar aurton

jaisa ho jaata hai! kya baat hai?"

Premi- "Sab poorvajo ka dosh hai! Mere aadhe

poorvaj mard the aur aadhe stree!"

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Premi- "Priy, mera interview leter aaya hai!

jau ya nahi, tumhari kya raye hai?"

Premika- "Meri to raye yah hai ki jaana hai to

jao, nahi jaana ho to na jao!"

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Seeta- "Are! vah khoobsurat naujavaan to mere

peeche pagal hai!"

Neeta- "Isme tumhari kya taareef hai, vah

to pichle kaye saalo se pagal hai!"

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Rogi- "Docter saahab, muje kab tak kadvi cheeje khaani padegi?"

Docter- "Jab tak mera bill adaa na kar doge!"

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Police chouki par ek phone aaya- "Inspector saahab,

kisi ne meri motor ke saare purje chura liye hai,

break, cluch, exelator, handle sabhi gaayab hai!"

Inspector- "Mai abhi aakar jaanch karta hu!"

Inspector jaane ko taiyaar hua tha ki phone ki ghanti

baj uthi! Ve hi sajjan bol rahe the- "Shama kare,

inspector saahab, yaha sab thik hai! baat yah hui

ki mai jaldi me pichli seat par baith gaya tha!"

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Leena- "Tum apni maang me hare rang ka sindoor

kyu lagati ho... Vivaahit striyaa to apni

maang laal sindoor se bharti hai!

Seeta- "Mere pati railway me engine driver hai...

jab mai laal sindoor lagati hu to vah muje

dekhkar ruk jaate hai! Isliye mai hara sindoor

lagati hu taaki vah muje dekhkar aage badh jaye!"

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Banta- "Maaf kijiye bhai saahab! Mai aapko ghoore

bina reh na saka! Sirf moocho ka farak hai, varana

aapki soorat to sau feesdi meri biwi se milti hai!"

Santa- "Lekin meri to mooche nahi hai!"

Banta- "Muje maaloom hai! Meri biwi ke hai!"

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Pita- "Bete, ro kyu rahe ho! Kya maasterji

ko bukhaar jyada ho gaya?"

Beta- "Kya batau pitaji, maasterji to ache

hue jaa rahe hai!"

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Ek mahila sabji kharidne ke baad dukaandaar

se boli- "Agar sabji kharaab nikli to paki

-pakai vaapas kar jaungi!"

Dukaandaar- "To fir uske saath do-char

chapatiya bhi le aaiyega!"

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Ramdev- "Ramprasad, tum to shaadi na karne ki

kasam khaye baithe the! Tum hamesha shaadi ke virudh

rahe ho! Fir jhatpat shaadi kaise kar daali?"

Ramprasad- "Muje bilkul apne vichaaro ki

ladki jo mil gayi! Vah bhi shaadi ke khilaaf thi!"

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Premi- "Mai tumhe bagair chue 'kiss' kar

sakta hu!"

Premika- "Rahi shart ek-ek rupaye ki!"

(premi kiss karta hai)

Premika- "Tumne muje chua hi nahi, balki

pakda bhi hai!"

Premi- "Haa, mai shart haar gaya, ye lo ek rupaya!"

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Premika ne premi ko ghar bulakar swaadisht cheeje

khilayi aur utsah se pucha- "Kaisi bani hai?"

Premi- "Achi, bahut achi, kis dukaan ki hai?"

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Patni (Jhallakar)- "Aapne apne jeevan me sabse

adhik bhalayi ka kaam kaun-sa kiya hai?"

Pati- "Tum jaisi yuvti se vivaah!"

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Santa ki patni uske Driver ke saath bhaag gayi

to Banta ne poocha- "Agar vah vaapas aa jaye to

kya tum use vahi pyaar doge, jo pehle dete the?"

Santa- "Nahi, albattaa Driver ko apne paas

rakh loonga! Itne swaamibhakt Driver aajkal milte

hi kaha hai?"

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Maali haath jodkar saamne khada ho gaya!

Maalik- "Kya hai daulatram?"

Maali- "Sarkaar, mai theka lene aaya hu!"

Maalik- "Kis baat ka theka?"

Maali- "Sarkaar charcha hai ki jab aapki ladki

hasti hai to phool jhadte hai! Hujoor, un phoolon

ka theka de de to garib aadmi ka bhala ho jayega!"

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Premi- "Tumse milkar to muje Reena Roy ki

yaad aa jaati hai!"

Premika- "Acha!"

Premi- "Ek kiss dena!"

Premika- "Nahi"

Premi- "Kyu?"

Premika- "Vo bhi to nahi deti!"

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Ghar se bhaag jaane ki neeyat se premi premika ko aadhi

raat ke samay khidki ke raaste baahar nikalte dekhkar

pados ki hamdard mahila ne ishaaraa karte hue kaha-

"Shhh...dheere, kahi mere pati na jaag jaaye?"

Premi- "Ve pehle hi jaage hue hai aur hamaare liye

Taxi lene gaye hai!"

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Premi- "Tumhaare daant dekhkar lagta hai ki tumhaari umar

15 saal hogi! Ghane baalo ko dekhkar lagta hai ki 20 saal

hogi aur chanchalta dekhkar lagta hai ki sirf solah saal hogi!"

Premika- "Acha! meri umar sahi batao to jaanu!"

Premi- "Kul ikyaavan varsh!"

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Makeup me ladee bhoodi premika se uske javaan premi

ne uski umar poochi!

Premika- "Hogi yahi koi bees-pachees saal aur aapki?"

Premi (chidhkar)- "Mai abhi janam lene ka prayatna kar raha hu!"

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