Friday, April 15, 2011

[Hindi_Jokes] Funny Jokes(Puns)

 

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Two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar.
One says,
"I've lost my electron."
The other says,
"Are you sure?"
The first replies,
"Yes, I'm positive"

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The foreman at a coal mine in Scotland fell down a tunnel.
The problem was that the workmen could hear him shouting for help, but because of the echo, it was impossible to determine which of three adjacent tunnels he'd fallen down. They wanted to lower rescue equipment to haul him out, but they didn't want to waste time or money going down the wrong hole.
So, they decided to try this:
They would take a biscuit and tie a string around it, then lower it down each hole to see if the foreman would grab for it.
Then, they would know which tunnel to send down the rescue equipment.
But, of course, this didn't work because a trolling scone gathers no boss.
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As your teenagers grow up,
Have you ever wished they could be de-sired. 

One day in school, the teacher wrote on the blackboard,
"I ain't had no fun at all last week."
She turned to her class and said,
"Now, what should I do to correct that?"
A shy student stood up and replied meekly,
"Maybe you should get a boyfriend."

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Show me a famous composer's liquor cabinet and I'll show you Beethoven's Fifth.

An older man wearing a stovepipe hat, a waistcoat and a phony beard sat down at a bar and ordered a drink.
As the bartender set it down, he asked,
"Going to a party ?"
"Yeah," the man answered, "I'm supposed to come dressed as my love life."
"But you look like Abe Lincoln." protested the barkeep.
"That's right. My last four scores were seven years ago."

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Lightning sometimes shocks people because it just doesn't know how to conduct itself.

We all know that Columbus believed the world was round when others believed it was flat and that if you travelled far enough you would go over the edge.
We also know that Columbus reached what we now know as America.
While there are still a few who believe Columbus returned to Spain and told Queen Isabella that he discovered a new world, most believe he had told her he had reached India.
Recently documents written by Queen Isabella's official scribe were uncovered revealing what Columbus actually said on returning from his first voyage.
His first words were,
"I'll bet I'm the first man who ever got nineteen hundred miles on a galleon."

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What would men be without women?
Scarce, sir. Mighty scarce.

A man trying to understand the nature of God and asked Him:
"God how long is a million years to you?"
And God answered:
"A million years is like a minute."
Then, the man asked:
"God, how much is a million dollars to you?"
And God replied:
"A million dollars is like a penny."
Finally, the man asked:
"God, could you give me a penny?"
And God said,
"In a minute."

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There are two ways of constructing a software design.
One way is to make it so simple that there are obviously no deficiencies.
And the other way is to make it so complicated that there are no obvious deficiencies.



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