CHAK DE
Time for some Mumbai tips:
1. If you are a real Mumbaikar and away from Mumbai, you get sentimental even if you hear words like Andheri and Bandra.
2. Mumbai - the only city where people no matter what language, religion and caste, express frustration by saying 'chyayla'.
3. The only place where even bus conductor motivates us "chalo aage badho"
4. For Mumbaikars - Burger bole toh bakwaas, vada pav bole toh zakhaas.
5. Mumbaikars - we will stand in empty trains and will fight for seat in crowded ones.
6. We don't believe that the train is gonna arrive until the time indicator displays "01 mins remaining"
7. Yes act dead if someone ask for your seat in "Mumbai local"
8. Mumbai - A city where people come to make their career and end up making their life.
9. A city with blend of different people and three things, 'pudhil station', 'agla station', and 'next station'
10. Slow local trains - the one which halts at all stations
Fast trains - the one which halts in between the stations.
11. Everything is fair in love, war and local trains.
12. You never say angry. You say "dimaag ki maa behen ek ho gayi he"
13. Mumbaikar to auto wala - sakinaka chaloge? Auto wala - nahi. Mumbaikar - saale dubai chalega?
14. Some words we use often - ghanta, waat lagayi, aai shapath, item, pandu, faadu, iski maa ka, bhai party, bantai, kat le, jhol, le bhari, ek number bhai.
15. Local trains are the only place in Mumbai where men are more civilized than women.
16. In India we drive on the left of the road. In Mumbai we drive on what is left on the road.
17. That awesome moment when in local trains you dont have to move towards the exit, you are simply pushed towards it by the crowd
18. In Mumbai matter word has more social reference than scientific (matter ho gaya bhai)
19. While giving directions you say right/left maaro aur aahan pe ek bridge Girega
20. If Borivali passenger gets into a Virar fast train. Thats a serious crime boss.
21. Once you survive in a Mumbai local during journey from Virar to Churchgate or vice versa during peak hours. Boss you can survive anywhere in the world.
22. Train timings (9.27, 10.49 etc) are really important events of life.
23. In every local train journey you will find atleast one person asking " arey yeh platform kis taraf aayegi?"
24. No salsa, hiphop, moon walk, B'boying or jazz can beat our visarjan dance.
25. No starbucks flavored coffee can beat of our own cutting chai/ coffee.
26. Nobody remains "untouched" once you enter Virar / Churchgate fast local.
27. There is a invisible station between Borivali and Kandivali called as "Thambevali"
28. We dont understand "humko and tumko". We prefer "tereko and mereko"
29. Second clasd ticket Rs 9 and first class ticket Rs 104. No difference. You can't sit in either.
30. Getting a virar fast train from Andheri / Borivali during peak hours is more difficult than getting into IIT and IIM.
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Posted by: Mahesh Popat <mahesh_popat@ymail.com>
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